A Curse is a Curse of Course of Course

What is the world coming to when you can't even trust your local psychic? Klarissa Castro from North Hollywood, California has sued psychic Jennifer Williams for fraud and negligent infliction of emotional distress. Castro claims she went to Westside Psychic Readings by Jana and was told during her initial reading that she was cursed and would need more sessions to lift the curse. Williams the psychic (aka Jana) told Castro she would need to buy some "special" candles. Castro spent over $4,000 on sessions with the psychic over two years. Castro also bought $1,400 worth of gift cards for Williams to buy items that would help lift the curse. The straw that broke the camel's back was when Castro paid $5,020 for a painting that would really help lift the curse. Well the curse lifting painting never was delivered and none of the promised changes in Castro's life happened. That's when Castro clued in that she'd been duped! Call in the lawyers because they are there to help you too.

Idiot of the Week

Arrogance gets you no where and this was proved once again by idiot and fugitive Wanda Lee Ann Podgurski. Wanda Lee Ann was convicted in absentia for the charge of insurance fraud. Good old Wanda Lee Ann was sentence to 20 years but was on the lam and tweeted on her twitter account. "Catch me if you can!" Well you guess it the new face of arrogance was caught! She was nabbed in Rosarita, Mexico and now faces yet an additional 30 years in prison. As she is already 60 she will be enjoying her golden years in the slammer. Wanda Lee Ann you are no Leonardo DiCaprio and even he was captured.

Westboro Baptist Church Gets Even Crazier

The fake Baptist Church know as the Westboro Baptist Church is know for being crazy homophobic racist idiots but they may have just out done themselves! Ben Phelps a member of this hate mongering family of bigots has called Taylor Swift a whore. "This girl is a whore" he insists. “Who else is gonna say that if it’s not the church of the Lord Jesus?" Um I don't think Jesus would go for that kind of talk Mr. Phelps.
Who will they be going after next? Mother Theresa? Perhaps the evil Pope? Their newest round of insane insults were made in an interview with Radar Online. Do they really think insulting "America's Sweetheart" is going to get results in their effort to fill the world with more hate?

Idiot of the Week!

So you are a scum bag murderer (perhaps) and you are on trial. You hope you have hired a good defense attorney right? But your day in court arrives and this is what you get!
“Knock, knock,”
“Who’s there?”
“George Zimmerman.”
“George Zimmerman who?”
“All right. Good. You're on the jury.”
Yeah that it what George Zimmerman got from his attorney Don West as an opening statement. Granted his client is  racist "alleged" murderer George Zimmerman but even an "alleged" murderer is due a competent defense.
Don West you are the Idiot of the Week!

Oculolinctus

What will those kids think up next? Well I have an answer it called oculolinctus or worming or just plain old eyeball licking. Yes licking an eyeball is a new fad. Not only is icky sounding it can also be bad for you to boot. It is a very easy way to pass around conjunctivitis aka pink eye. Ask an elementary school in Japan where eyeball lick was all the rage until more than half the school came down with pink eye.
Why would one want to lick and eyeball or have ones eyeball lick you may ask; well it seems that there is a certain amount of pleasure in it for the participants. Ophthalmologists obviously don't think this is a good idea and warm it could actually cause blindness if the licker has a dirty mouth and lets face it a lot of people have dirty mouths. The human mouth is filled with germs of all sorts.
So kids if you must lick something stick with a good old fashioned toad.

He's No Disney but he is Goofy

He is not a real Disney although he claimed he was. Stephen David Urquidez age 51 from Canyon Country, CA was arrested after he claimed to be Stephen Disney heir to the Disney fortune. Claiming to be a Disney isn't a real crime but giving stolen Disney passes to s non-profit charity for a auction is and that is what Urquidez is charged with doing. When police nailed him they discovered a fake driver's license and a W-2 claiming income from the Walt Disney Corporation.
The winner of the Disney passes went to use them and it was then discovered that they were hadn't been activated and had been stolen. The Walt Disney Corporation has confirmed that Stephen Disney has no connection with the Disney Family. Urquidez claims it wasn't him and he has been confused with someone else who once lived in his home named Disney.
Urquidez/Disney has been released on $20,000 bail. LA County sheriffs are looking into him to see if he has duped others. What a goofy thing to do!

I am Obsessed with Amy's Baking Company

I love a freak show. Who doesn't, right? Well they best freak show around right now is Amy's Baking Company in Scottsdale, Arizona. The moment they appeared on Kitchen Nightmares the owners have became super star freaks. Such freaks they may just be criminally insane. Tip stealing and screaming at their staff and customers. They also seemed to have made every mistake a crazy person make on Facebook and Yelp.
If you don't know the story of Amy's Baking Company I will try to distill it into a few sentences if I can. Samy and Amy Bouzaglo own a restaurant in Scattsdale where she is the "chef' and he is the "Maitre d" here's the rub She can't cook and he is a vulgar bully. They abuse their staff and customers and happily did it on Gorden Ramsey's Kitchen Nightmares. They were so horrid Gordon Ramsey, a foul mouthed punk at best, thought they were insane and left the restaurant. Shutting the whole show down. Gordon Ramsey did air the episode and it make for some amazing TV. No editor could make these people look worse than they really are. Samy and Amy have also taken to berating people on Yelp for any negative reviews. Then Mr. &Mrs Crazy then took to Facebook using the dreaded "fuck" in the same sentences where they claim themselves as Christians. When confronted by local media they claim that their Facebook page was hacked as was Yelp and several other websites. They also say they have the FBI investigating the whole thing.
If you get a chance to watch the Kitchen Nightmare episode do it. It is amazingly funny in a crazy people doing crazy people things way. Samy threatens to beat up a customer and Amy screams obscenities at everyone she encounters.

What Not To Do On Your Honeymoon

So you and your new wive are on your honeymoon and she isn't putting out. What do you do? Uhm you go and hire a hooker. That seemed like the right thing to do to Mr. Mohammed Ahmed age 21 (duh) while he and his new wifey-poo were in Champions Gate, Florida. The Illinois newlyweds were on their honeymoon staying at a nice enough hotel having a nice enough time when a horny Mohammed decided to step out for a bit and for some. Well he wnet on-line and contacted a "hooker" who turned out to be a cop. Oops! Well Mohammed's penis led him to another nearby address and he was nabbed along with 92 other horndogs. Wifey-poo was naturally concerned and called the sheriff's office to report her new husband missing. Well needless to say she was dismayed to find out that her newly betrothed was also a newly incarcerated.
Moral of the story on your honeymoon sleeop with your spouse or else!

A Headline You Can't Make Up

"Woman Singing Whitney Houston Songs Forces Emergency Landing of American Airlines Flight". That is a headline no one could make up! The scary part is it is true. And come on there is really nothing that can take a plane down faster than a loud bad rendition of "I will Always Love You". Let's face it even if Whitney herself was singing it after a bit you would be yelling "Shut Up" too.
The poor passengers on the American Airlines flight from LAX to JFK were more than happy to stop in Kansas City to shut that chick up!

Idiot of the Week

Etta Lopez wins the award for idot of the week! Ms Lopez 31, is the winner because of her method of quitting smoking. She decided that she should be put in jail without access to cigarettes. So she slapped a cop in the face.
Lopez was arrested outside of the Sacramento County Sheriff's office after she waited for a uniformed officer to exit and when one did she walked up and slapped him in the face. Her victim was Deputy Matt Campoy. It was just after 4:20 pm when Lopez approached the officer who tried to step away to avoid her but she step back into his path and slapped him in the face.
Long stupid story short Etta Lopez is behind bars and it looks like she isn't smoking so it worked.

Twitter Users Thought Cher Was Dead

Twitter may have completely destroyed language as we know it and Cher has taken the brunt of it. Twitter users post with the hash tag "nowthatcherisdead" meaning Margaret Thatcher was dead not Now that Cher is dead. This got some of your lessor readers and Cher zealots in a panic. They actually thought that Cher had died. Like anything could kill Cher. She is alive and I would assume laughing her tucked ass off over this reading mishap.

Idiot of the Week

This week there was a true idiot in Hollywood. Yes imagine that an idiot in Hollywood. This idiot takes the cake. Mister Idiot was at the Hooters on Hollywood Blvd. Sign one he is an idiot then he proceeded to tell someone he had a bomb with him. This of course brought a swift police action including the swat team. Hollywood Blvd was shut down and helicopters circled. Well it turns out he then claimed it was a joke. Oh you wacky jokesters! Maybe you should have given that a little more thought it was three days after the Boston Marathon Bombing do you think maybe this wasn't a good idea.

Did That Bird Just Call Me A Whore?

A complaint has been filed in a municipal court in Warwick, Rhode Island against a woman named Lynne Taylor stating she has taught her bird to swear at her neighbor. The neighbor is Kathleen Melker she is the next door neighbor of Ms Taylor and lives with Taylor's ex-husband Craig Fontaine. The houses are fairly close together (50 feet) and Ms Melker claims that anytime she is in eye sight of the bird it swears at her calling her a "fucking whore". Needless to say this is causing a bit of a problem. The Warwick Police have been called over a dozen time to the houses and have cited Taylor with a noise ordinance complaint. Melker has video taped the bird screaming out of the window at her. On the video tape the bird is clearly heard to say "fuck off" and "fucking whore". Both parties have taken out restraining orders. There have also been complaints of rock throwing and garden hose spraying. Taylor at on point painted a large mural on a rundown building on her property of a cockatoo aka the swearing bird. She has removed the mural and has now painted her car with a cockatoo.
When the case went to court Taylor was fined $15 for the noise violation. Willy the cockatoo was not called to testify. Taylor is contesting the fine.

The moral of this story: Never move in next to your ex-wife and her foul mouthed bird.

No More Jersey Shore

MTV has signed the death certificate for "Jersey Shore". This will be the last season for the stupid and inane yet oddly popular reality show. Boo Hoo how sad. Yeah right. What ever will become of the guidos and guidettes? Who cares. Snooki has gone off an become some poor boy's mother, Pauly D is back to being a DJ and I guess part time car salesman again. The Situation and the others will wring the last couple of bucks from the fleeting fame and fade away into the oblivion they came from. In the words of my grandmother, "Good riddance to bad rubbish." Will anyone really be sorry to see them go?

How Not to Make it in Hollywood

Unknown actor Vivek Shah will be able to teach a course in not making it in Hollywood if he gets out of jail. Vivek Shah was arrested recently for attempting to extort money from Harvey Weinstein one of Hollywood's heaviest hitters. Shah sent Mr. Weinstein a letter to kill a member of the Weinstein unless money was deposited into an off shore bank account. Oddly this has worked out for Vivek Shah. He was arrested outside of his family's home in Chicago. Mr Shah was a West Hollywood resident and aspiring actor with small roles in a few TV shows. It seems his 15 minutes are now over!

Willard's Willy

Hollywood has a reputation for being "dirty". Despite Disney's attempts to clean it up there are some hold outs of sleaze. One of those hold outs is The Tiki Theater on Santa Monica Blvd. The Tiki is notorious for good ole dirty fun. One of the celebrants this week was actor Fred Willard. Mr. Willard is famous for his humorous roles in films and on television. He is now famous for being arrested for "lewd acts" at the Tiki Theater. It seems Willard's willy was wanked Wednesday. It has been reported that his trousers were not in the proper place. Perhaps they were in the proper place for watching a porn movie but not for a public place. Oh Fred what were you thinking you are 72!

To the Beibermobile!

Justin Beiber was pulled over for reckless driving on the 101 in Studio City. He was driving his Fisker Karma at a very high speed on a very busy LA freeway at 10:45am. It has been reported that he was driving at speeds nearing 100 mile per hour. Little Mr. Beiber claims he was being chased by paparazzi. He was trying to elude the tabloid photographers. Granted he is young but has he never heard of Princess Diana? Not only was he weaving through traffic endangering himself and his brand but he was endangering the public. Not his public but the general public. The biggest crime itself may well be the car Justin was driving. It is a shiny chrome $100,000 automobile. You want to be left alone Justin try driving a less conspicuous vehicle, perhaps a Prius or maybe as you are in LA a Mercedes coupe.
A call to 911 was placed by LA City Councilman Dennis Zine who was on the road and witnessed the Beib racing through Studio City. Oddly Dennis Zine recently proposed a local ordinance against aggressive paparazzi.

Casey Anthony Can't Go Outside, Good

Casey Anthony claims her life is a misery now and she can't go outside. She is living in a prison. Oh boo hoo and shut up. The civilized world is tired of hearing from and about you. Guilty, innocent who cares. You were more than an announce for well over a year causing a stir that was frankly disgusting and vile if you are guilty or not. If your parents and their inane squabbles are never seen again too; that's an added bonus. You can't leave the house; good! Why don't you do the rest of the world a favor and stay in, watch TV and get fat quietly. Casey Anthony represents a generation of Americans who were told they were exceptional but weren't. A generation of trophy receiving, coddled, entitled nobodies who expect to be treated like royalty has been raised in this country. The Snookies and Casey Anthonys are poster children who rightfully deserve to be on a milk carton. Vulgarity and stupidity has replaced intelligence and creativity. The only difference between Snookie and Casey is the Anthony creature may or may not have committed a crime. Otherwise they are cut from the same self indulgent cloth. 
It time for Casey and her ilk to grow a pair. Get a job, get some therapy and shut up.

Flour Bomb

A Kardashian was flour bombed! Good! I wish I had thought of it myself. These broads have zero talent other than being in the public eye. They actually make Paris Hilton look qualitative! Paris at least has a six degree of seperation from Zsa Zsa. The Kardashians are connected to OJ.

PETA hates them but then again who doesn't PETA hate? Kim got hit with a flour bomb; why? Who cares. The worst thing is it was a waste of perfectly good flour that could have been used in making a lovely cake or thicking a sauce. Why waste good processed wheat on these people? Why waste time and energy on this family? Television is paying them so they can support their freaky mother and Bruce Jenner's plastic surgery addiction. Everyone claims not to watch them yet there they are on television and walking red carpets to chat with Mario Lopez. Selling sleazy looks at Sears does not a star make. Come on they are selling stuff at Sears, its a place you buy a dishwasher not a trousseau!
Instead of flour bombing them and wasting flour perhaps they should be pelted with empty lipsticks or waterr bottles or better yet the ultimate torture ignored!