Octogenarian Jewel Thief

Doris Mae Paine has struck again! Ms Paine is a jewel thief and she is also 83 years old. Doris has had a long career as a thief and done time for her thefts. She was recently just nabbed again for attempting to steal a $22,000 ring from a Palm Desert, California jewelry store. Doris Mae just recently got out of the slammer after a 2 and 1/2 year stint for stealing an $8,000 ring from a San Diego department store. Doris say she has stole over 2 million bucks worth of gems in her lifetime. Her thefts have taken her to New York and Monte Carlo where she has pinched ice and lived off the precedes of her crimes. 
Doris is also the subject of a documentary "The Life and Crimes of Doris Payne". There is also talk of a biopic in the works in which Doris is played by Hallie Berry although Doris would rather see Queen Latifa in the role.

The Chubby Cheeks Bandit

Santa Ana California police and the FBI are on the lookout for a woman who has robbed a bank in Santa Ana. She has been given the name "The Chubby Cheeks" bandit. The robber demanded money at a Chase Bank in Santa Ana. She was described as being in her late 20's 5 foot 3 inches tall and weighing around 170 pounds. She is called the Chubby Cheeks Bandit as witness described her as having Chubby Cheeks.
How embarrassing to have to go through life with a moniker like that. I guess it is better than being the Fat Ass Bandit or maybe the bad acne bandit.